My mind is made up. Don't try to convince me otherwise.

I used to swear to myself,

I’d do anything to get away.

But seeing the rolling countryside,

Touches my soul more than any building.

I’m always looking for something,

Bigger, better, newer, faster.

Not anymore, this time I’m content

With this love I’ve found.

I don’t want an education,

I don’t need a job.

I just need a box, in which to keep you safe,

One with a lock, not to keep you in, but everything else out.

When the hours drift away to days,

Five hundred and seventeen, to be exact,

My mind always seems to drift away,

It always ends up in the same place.

Don’t call me young,

Don’t call me naïve.

By their standards, I am an adult.

And I’ve made my decision.

I cant explain this certainty,

But I have always been stubborn.

I just know this, more than I have ever known anything,

We will always belong together.

why bother pouring my heart out

when it falls on deaf ears.

you are the sun in my life

Walking to my car,
I was listening to "Do you remember?"
Like I do at least once a day,
either on my way to or from school

the sky was dark and gloomy,
foreshadowing my 6 hour shift tonight

then, the clouds broke,
the sun warmed my face,
I closed my eyes,
and instantly, images of your beautiful face filled my head.
Of us laying together in the grass
smiling at each other, laughing,
the sun shining down upon us,
not a care in the world.

I opened up my eyes again, and smiled.
I cant wait for summer.

And I realized the reason that warm weather actually makes me happy.
Not because of vitamin D.
But because it makes me think of you,
your beautiful skin,
your golden hair,
everything about you, I was reminded of in that moment.

But most of all,
I was reminded of just how much I love you,
and that I want to spend every possible day with you
for the rest of my life.
Because you're perfect, you are mine.
and I love you.

little things.

Its 3:58 in the morning, I'm barely halfway done my outline, and instead I'm thinking of you.

The other night, when you were sleeping, you turned away from me once, which I told you about.

Then a couple minutes later, this happened, which I didnt tell you about.

we were laying together, nothing but a few small articles of clothing between us.

You were asleep, holding me, and I was holding you, looking at you, gently sweeping the hair out of your face, feeling your soft cheek.

you twitched, so I knew you were completely asleep.

my phone went off, and I hesitated, not wanting to wake you up, but I figured you were pretty far gone.

Then just as I started to turn away from you, your grip on me tightened, and the calm expression on your face looked upset, and worried.

I rolled back towards you, and ran my hand over your smooth back.

The corner of your mouth curled a little into a smile, you pulled me a little closer, and your expression then returned to a calm, peaceful look.

I know none of this was conscious, I know you didnt do any of this intentionally, but I think that makes it even more important... even while youre asleep, I comfort you, and make you happy.

Little things like this speak volumes about how we feel about each other.

That same night, tears rolled down my cheek for the first time in at least five years, not because of when you turned away, but because of the thought that one day, you might not turn back.

But thinking back now, this second event was really the one that mattered.

I dont know why Im writing all this, but its late, and this way, I feel some connection to you.

You truly are the love of my life Stephanie, I really do believe that.

You were laying there, on your stomach, half asleep, saying that your stomach hurt.

I unclasped your bra, and just started rubbing your back, massaging each section , feeling your smooth skin, moving my hands over each muscle, each vertebrae.

Before I knew it, you were back asleep.

I know you always apologize when you fall asleep, or when youre not feeling well because youre "not being any fun"
but Stephanie,
I would gladly spend every night sitting next to you, rubbing your back as you drifted back to sleep.

I love you Stephanie.

Every part of your personality.
Every thought you have.
Every inch of your beautiful body.

I love it all.

and I would gladly spend the rest of my life figuring out everything there is to figure out about Stephanie Michele Kohler.

I could go a lot of places in my life, and experience a lot of things..
"But I’d rather wake up beside you and breathe that ol ’familiar smell"



this is love Stephanie.
this is real.

(<3)x(∞)

onesentence.

Its only been six months and I would give anything to spend the rest of my life with her.

the real thing

I lay here,
Looking up into your gorgeous brown eyes.
The way the light catches them,
Turning them to a thousand different shades.
Like strokes on canvas.

Our legs intertwined,
I can feel your warmth,
I can feel your breath.

Your heart always beats slower than mine.

I break my gaze away from yours,
and bury my head in your shoulder.
I breathe deep,
Deeper than I ever have.
Trying to fill my lungs, my heart, my soul,
with the smell of you.

So I wont ever forget it.

I laugh, you giggle,
We toss and turn,
Roll across the sheets,
Back and forth.

I lay here.
Looking into your gorgeous brown eyes,
Singing verses of love,
That just seem to fit, as if they were tailored for us.
And I know why...

This is love.

i'm sorry

I know you hate it when I apologize,
but I just cant help it.

Not this time anyway.

Nothing has happened,
But I'm filled with uncertainty.
And fear of what could be.

And on the slightest of chances,
if our fears are true.
I'm so, so sorry...

I have ruined everything,
I am disgusted with myself.
I am a sad, sad excuse for everything,
everything that I should be.

But if our fears are true,
I will do everything in my power to make it right.
To fix our dumb mistakes,
To take care of you.

We can get through this, in silent, in private.

But I hope I'm worrying for nothing.